If you watch Vanderpump Rules online, you know that an obnoxious amount of the show’s fifth season was devoted to the run-up to the wedding of Tom Schwartz and Katie Maloney.
We say an obnoxious amount of time, because the show asked us to really care about these two, despite the fact that it’s difficult to think of a more unlikable couple in the history of reality television.
Don’t get us wrong – we’re sure they’re both decent enough folks on their own.
(Katie could stand to bid tequila a permanent adios, but that’s a conversation for another time,)
But as a couple, these two make Jax and Brittany look like a match made in heaven.
They’re just not good together.
They fight constantly; they don’t appear to enjoy one another’s company when they’re not fighting; and the insults they hurl at one another veer into verbal abuse territory with disturbing regularity.
We know that reality shows are edited in order to maximize drama and there’s nothing compelling about a happy couple enjoy a quiet dinner at home.
But it’s important to remember that Vanderpump only shoots for a little over three months each year.
You can film a stable, healthy couple for several years and not compile that much troubling footage.
All of this is to say that literally no one was shocked when talk of Schwartz and Maloney getting divorced began to circulate online.
The rumors bagan as a result of a cryptic tweet from co-star Jax Taylor, but they quickly took on a life of their own.
Maloney’s mother has denied the rumors, but multiple sources have come forward to reveal that the situation is rellay as bad as it seems.
One needs only to look at the dearth of couple photos on Tom and Katie’s social media profiles to conclude that all is not well in Bubba Land.
“Katie and Tom are on the rocks,” a source close to the couple tells Radar Online.
Naturally, there are multiple theories with regard to who’s really to blame.
Katie’s anonymous friends say Tom is a chronic flirt who refuses to change his ways.
Team Schwartz insiders say the problem is that Katie spends all her time with Stassi Schroeder and the rest of her trash-talking chick clique:
“Katie is with Stassi [Schroeder] and the ‘Witches of WeHo’ 24/7 and isn’t focusing on her marriage,” one source explains.
“Tom can’t stand Katie with the mean girls all the time.”
Whatever the case, it’s good time to get out your Tom and Katie Divorce Pool and see if you had late June of 2017.
It’s longer than most thought they would last, but your faith in their stubborness appears to have paid off.
Be sure to have a good laugh at the expense of your friends who thought they would last a year.