A few days ago, we heard some truly terrifying news … news that shook us all to our very cores.
Blac Chyna, the woman who somehow managed to build an entire career off of being Tyga’s girlfriend, may possibly be releasing some music.
The thought is almost too much to bear, isn’t it?
Not only is Chyna considering a new career in music, she also wants to be “the new Nicki Minaj,” even though we already have one Nicki Minaj and that is plenty.
Her music may come sooner rather than later, too, because she’s reportedly already been recording things.
You know, things like rap, singing, and “poetry music.”
She’s been meeting with various record labels to seal the deal, and if she does manage to get signed somewhere, it shouldn’t be too long until we’re exposed to the smooth sounds of Chyna.
What is the deal with 2017 and what did we ever do to deserve this whole stupid year?
It’s hard to find a silver lining in all of this, since it’s almost certain that any music Chyna releases will be literally the worst thing anyone’s ever heard.
We imagine it would be something along the lines of Farrah Abraham’s classic auditory assault, “Blowin’.”
But if you’re the kind of person who likes to see the glass as half-full, then maybe you could look at it like this: if Chyna does release music, there’s a chance she could release music about Rob Kardashian.
If you think about it, right now would be the best time for her to release a diss track.
It’s been just about a month since Rob went off on her, making allegations that she’s on drugs and that she brings a wide variety of men into the home she shares with her two small children.
As you surely remember, during that same rant Rob also released nude photos of her — and why wouldn’t you want to get revenge on some revenge porn?
If she did make a song about Rob, or even a song that could potentially be about Rob, it would get a whole, whole lot of attention.
And you know how Blac Chyna loves her attention.
But even though it’s very possible that she could just destroy Rob through song, and even though it really does look like she’s setting up a music career for herself, Rob isn’t worried.
In fact, according to a new report from Hollywood Life, he’s pretty tickled about the whole thing.
“Rob has had some major laughs thinking about Blac Chyna trying to rap,” a source says.
“And even if she goes after Rob in her raps he think she will be so bad that it won’t matter because she will just be embarrassing herself.”
It’s sad, but true — seriously, there’s no way that music would be even a tiny bit good.
The source adds that Rob “is actually kind of looking forward to seeing her fail and thinks she will be even worse than K-Fed.”
OK, look, the revenge porn was disgusting, and also very illegal. And the comments he made about her body were just totally uncalled for.
But to compare her to Kevin Federline?
There’s no coming back from cruelty like this, Rob.